Way to go Asshole.
TheBoyChild’s school has something they call AIR Week….Artist In Residence. This year they have gotten a “junk to funk” performance artist to come in to expand the kids horizons and teach them.
Tonight is the performance for the parents. It is described as Stomp meets Blue Man Group.
While I am very excited to see my child perform…….it is seriously putting a damper on my day drinking agenda.
how have i ever lived without you in my life?! how have i found another smouldering female with my sense of humor?!
Ohhhhh Guuuuurl, you just turned into my favorite!!!! (thank you!!)
Snuggled on the sofa, no panties, no bra, in my pajamas….blanket wrapped around me….the dog curled up behind my knees pushed up against my butt…..
And then…..I lifted my leg and ripped a fart so loud and so long that the dog immediately jumped off the sofa, started barking and whining and then he started licking his butthole.
ALL THE SECKSAY!!!!
Related: watching Iron Man 2 again in prep for watching IR3
And eating Reese’s eggs.
Drunken Easter Bunny hid some Reese’s eggs, apparently.
And the sober Easter Bunny forgot where the hell they were hidden…..so they ceased to exist.
And holy jeebus….I found them tonight!!!!
Imma eat em all. Because my ass needs to be fatter.
Something about a darker skinned, hairy man….especially if he has a beard……….I’ll be in my bunk.
- Sail - AWOLNATION
- Soul Wars - AWOLNATION
- Radioactive - Imagine Dragons
- Bleeding Out - Imagine Dragons
- Fools Rhythm - Two Fingers
- Nightcall - Kavinsky feat. Lovefoxxx
- Hold On - Catie Curtis
- Come Back - Pearl Jam
- Mr Hurricane - Beast
- I’d Love to Be Your Last - Gretchen Wilson
Bonus Track: Oscar Wilde - Company of Thieves
(which I had no recollection of having on my iTunes and have no recollection of purchasing and downloading it)
I can solve that puzzle with one hand and my tongue in less than 2 minutes!
It’s not that complicated….just lick it, flick it, tickle it, suck it, rub it, warm breath against it, nibble it, finger , tease it…….until my thighs clench your around your face, one hand grabs your head…making sure you don’t move holding you there, my other hand twisted in the sheets…..clinging, holding myself to the bed, my heals dig into your back pulling you closer to me…..until I’m either begging for you to take me hard and fast Now…..or wilted softly into your arms for you to hold me and kiss me and make love me…..
See not really complicated…..it’s the clit. Not. The. G. Spot.